Life...

My stepmom passed away one week ago today. This was unexpected, she wasn't in good health, but she was just at our house the Sunday before. Linda was so good about calling and checking on Caleb, she would bring him chocolate shakes and in the beginning of all of this with Caleb, she gave him a little cross necklace to hang onto and he did, through the first chemo treatment, he asked for it on the first night and slept with it, we will miss her. To see my dad cry is almost as hard as watching Caleb go through this. I am praying that the next six months hold nothing but good news and good memories.
Last week the orthopedic surgeon released Caleb to go back in for chemo and to be fitted for his leg so on Tuesday of this week we went to the clinic to see the Dr. and he said Caleb is doing great and agreed that we could wait until next Wednesday to start chemo again. Jacob has a Dr.s appointment on Tuesday and I opted to put off chemo for one day so that we didn't have to change his appointment. The fact that I made a decision to put him first seem ed to really mean something to him, so I think we probably need to do that more often. I know that Jacob is feeling very left out through all of this, they are both getting the short end of the stick. Jake tries so hard to act like he can't stand Caleb but the other day he and I were in the laundry room and Caleb was coming out and fell down the stairs and Jacob ran and caught him before he could hit the ground, then later that night, he picked him up off the floor and carried him to the couch. The way these boys fight sends me right to the edge most days and then these little, short moments of reaching out touch me so much, and keep me going another day. Ok, so back to the schedule... Caleb is supposed to have another echo but they haven't called me yet with that information so I don't know when that will be, it was supposed to be on this coming Tuesday after Jacobs appointment but we'll see. So, Caleb does chemo on Wednesday, it is the short cycle, and then the following Monday he goes to be cast for his leg. On Friday of that week he goes back for fittings and then more fittings the week after that. Soon he will not have to use the crutches anymore. He will be relieved. Yesterday we were at Wal-mart and there was a little girl staring at him, I had not noticed this, but Caleb had put his crutches in the basket and was standing behind it so you could not see his lower half unless you came up from behind us. He finally said to me " I hate that", when I asked what he said the staring so I turned and saw the little girl. I've tried to tell him that the little kids are just curious, they just want to know what happened, they are usually sad for him but it still hurts him, he feels like a freak, anyway...I made eye contact with the little girl and she asked me very quietly what happened... so I told her. Every day it is something new, a new experience for us...stretching us, pulling us, refining us... He had a bad night last night, it has gotten so much better, so last night was a surprise. The "sock" that he has to wear over him stump causes his leg to hurt some, and he walked through most of Wal-mart yesterday, so by the time we got out of there he was already in some pain and we just couldn't get it under control until about 4:30 this morning. He is sleeping right now (9:40) and I will let him sleep as long as he wants today. Well, I better get this posted, I have a long day ahead of me...preperation for tomorrow...Have a happy and safe 4th!!! Remember this, God is still God, He still watches over us, He loves us, each and every one...
"But the LORD is in His holy temple; the LORD still rules from heaven. He watches everyone closely, examining every person on earth."
Psalm 11:4 (NLT)